Only one twin invited to birthday party

I’ve done a class party and not invited the twin before. I didn’t actually think about it when I wrote all 30 names down. I’d just ask if it’s ok if you can bring child B and you’ll pay their entrance fee. Otherwise leave with dad if you think not having a party bag/cake ect would be an issue. You never know there might be spares.

They might just not be thinking! They have probably just got a class list and sent the invite out. Just drop them a message and ask? I wasn’t annoying at all when a couple of parents asked if they could bring siblings to my sons party. I would have been a bit miffed if they had just turned up without asking. Mainly as we have done food / party bags etc and paid for a certain amount of people

I agree with above I bet they just haven’t thought. I’d go with option A message and ask if it’s ok to bring them and pay your own entrance and offer to pay towards their pizza - I’m sure they’ll say no don’t be silly about the pizza but at least you’ve offered!

@Naomi by don’t ask, I meant option B in my preamble, bring him and pay, but don’t ask to be included in the party room and just either distract him or leave during the time spent in the party room. I see now that it was unclear in the poll options

I would ask and offer to pay but let them know it’s ok if they say no. They may have just invited the whole class because it’s a rule in most day cares. If they say no just leave him with dad

If they weren't twins and were a year apart would you be asking this question?

My opinion is 100% don’t bring, twin B wasn’t invited and asking the parent just makes it awkward for them and they’ll probably say yes to be polite. I’d only ask if childcare was an issue but still think it’s cheeky 💕

I would just have twin B stay with dad and have them plan something fun to do.

Option A is a good idea but this is also a good opportunity for dad to take twin b on there own adventure even if it’s just to the park to play and then lunch. That way they both have a fun day but are spending time alone developing individual personalities.

As they grow they will have different friends and won’t be invited to everything together. Leave him at home with dad

Id bring both and just pay for the second child myself who has child care to leave the other home not me lol some times it just comes down to being practical

I think it's rude and entitled to bring your other kid that wasn't invited and assumed that they could Just take part the twins or not it doesn't matter that they are twins they are their own person two different kids One was invited and the other other not a big deal especially sense they are in separate classes take this time to do something special and have some one on one time with the one that wasn't invited if it bothers you so much then keep both home but don't bring the other in hopes they will change the mind and let the one to now attend if they stick to what they said your going to hurt and upset your kid for no reason and if they change their mind it's because you guilt and them into it not because they wanted your kid there and I wouldn't want myself or my kid anywhere we weren't truly wanted if he was wanted they would of intended both not just one don't force it just let it go

What people said above. They prob don't know the ins and out of the families to all the children in the class. If I invited my daughters class and found out there was a twin at home I'd ofc let them come! Might be different if the children were different ages.

I would take twin b with you honestly. Honestly who would tell a 3.5 yr old no? And if they do, I would take twin a and twin b find something they can both do. Please note; this is only my opinion.

@Kristan it’s a public playplace and the birthday children are mixed in with all the patrons. The only thing exclusive to the birthday party is the party room, pizza, and cake, which he wouldn’t have to partake in. That’s option B, bring him and pay for general admission, don’t ask the parents if he can be part of the party, and then leave or distract him when they do the party stuff. It’s very common for parents to bring their other children and just let them play while the other child attends the birthday stuff.

Reach out and ask if it’s okay for twin b to attend. They may have asked the teacher for a list of names from the classroom. You can tell them that you’ll pay for B. You just wanted both to go together. Should be fine!

Honestly just ask, its likely they either assumed youre bringing both or forgot. I know when Ive invited people I assume they would understand I mean all their children x

I would leave with dad. Twin B (compared to twin A) might have a harder time socializing because they're not his peers

Dang so ya’ll are showing up for kids birthday parties were all u have done with the other parents is MAYBE a passing smile or pickup/drop off. I’m not that parent bt I’m commenting just to get perspectives. Were do ya’ll find the time to entertain these friendships aka shenanigans. Cuz I just want to get better at this parenting thing cuz sometimes I’m FORCED to hangout with other moms for the sake of my son bt this is why I’m on this app. So I can find ppl who gel with me AND my son & it’s like bonus points if our partners get along! Genevieve so much is to be applauded here cuz ur not only willingly to give ur energy & time to ppl who I probably won’t give my energy too bt ur thinking abt ur other kid twin same age as well! And I just checked ur profile & im ur a step mama to 2 grown women of 23 & 19 & twin biological boys. I can’t even begin to imagine were u even got th energy to write this post. Bt I wouldn’t go to the party. I’m not someone who deals with “stress” very well

Just the fact that u wrote this post tells me, this is been something u have thot abt so I personally wouldn’t go bt please don’t listen to me, I’m a bias bitch & don’t know what it’s like to have twins or be in ur position. The whole thing just sounds draining. Bt in all seriousness X I would jus go with BOTH twins & as other moms expresssed it’s plenty of open area for the other uninvited twin. Bt of them ppl was really ur friends or twins friends I would think they wud invite both twins smh, it’s jus a consideration

@Marian they all know each other. The rooms are right beside each other and they have outdoor time together. They also combine the classrooms at the end of the day when the numbers dwindle and some staff leave.

@Jasmin I’m pretty sure the mom just invited all the kids in the class. I want to go because I don’t really know any of the parents very well and this is the first time one of them has been invited to a birthday party. All the kids will be going to kindergarten in the fall so it will be nice to figure out which kids will be going to the same school. I’m torn, because part of me thinks it’s not a big deal to ask, but I also don’t want to put that mom in an awkward spot and make it weird.

If you feel bad about asking, a 3.5yo won't remember being left out. He'll probably care until Dad does something fun. It wouldn't bother me if you asked to bring the twin. I think the more the merrier.

I don't have twins but I think it depends on how you want to raise them. Do you want them to be seen as separate individuals or as a unit? I wouldn't assume the parents forgot, it just seems they invited the class and not other children their child might interact with outside , twins or not. But if you feel twin B will feel left out you can ask but I would just leave him at home with his dad, better to teach them early that they won't do the same thing all the time maybe. They will grow up having different friends too.

Option A. Or to make it less awkward, can the dad plan something equally as fun with twin B. E.g. park, pizza, and ice cream

Well we were planning to take the little ones out for a day while the older ones went to a party at a jumping place in the end the parents were thrilled that their kid had more kids to play with not alot of kids from his class showed up