Masturbating
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We don’t do porn in my house so if be extremely upset
I don’t mind…. Like.. hm. Okay. I feel like explaining. Example: When I was pregnant and didn’t want to anymore @ 8mnths. I’d joke and tell him when he went to take a shower to have fun. And then ask if he did lol, but he said he was using our videos “why use porn” so again. I couldn’t really be upset. Now if I was willing to, yes, I’d be annoyed because like… why not ask me? Even using ours or not
It would bother me if it’s instead of him having sex with me when I’ve been initiating and in the mood It wouldn’t bother me if I haven’t been in the mood The lying is annoying but the jacking off idc
It would annoy me that he felt he needed to keep it a secret. We’re very open with each other and he knows I will be happy to go down on him 100% of the time! My sex drive has been low since being pregnant but like 3-4x a week I’m almost begging him to let me suck on it😅
I would not care. Unless you never have sex and he prefers to do it solo. Then maybe it is an issue. But Sometimes it is just easier and quicker to masturbate. I see nothing wrong with that. People are allowed to have alone time.
It would depend on what else was going on. Come to me first and we’ll take care of it. No need to watch a video or take care of it alone if I’m home. I’ve been trying to catch him for 15 years and I never have.
As long as we're not busy etc I genuinely don't care if he wants to masturbate in his free time. It's healthy and normal, he doesn't have to come to me first, I don't own his body, he's a grown man who can decide if he wants sex etc or in that moment just quickly wants to get himself off.
It wouldn’t bother me, since I’m pulling out my toys on myself a lot lately. I just the most urgent cravings and I just need to release. I’m approaching the end, so not sure if it’s my body preparing for labor.
It would bother me if he weren’t attempting to hide it. Like, fair enough, everyone jerks off, but don’t be obvious about it.
My husband knows I don't like porn/masturbation since it noticbly affects his drive/performance and he (without my feelings) thinks it's negative for relationships to begin with and doesn't use it. I've dated people in the past that use it and hide/lie about it and I'm glad to not deal with that bs. My husband also doesn't smoke or drink, he's just against addictive behaviors altogether.
It’s the hiding it that would make me beyond annoyed. You’re a grown man. Just a simple “hey babe I’m in the mood are you? if not it’s okay but I’m going to take care of it then”. Like why are you hiding it??
@Alex this!!!
We have a rule of thumb called "initiate, don't masturbate" where, if reasonable, we try to initiate intimacy before resorting to that. I know he does it and he knows I do it. I'm a stay-at-home mom so I'm almost always in the house. I think it doesn't bother me because we both do it, and it's not a secret or anything.
I know my husband does (I've accidentally caught him a couple of times) and I really couldn't care less.
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@Alex 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I wouldn’t care. I will say, my husband says he hasn’t masturbated since I was freshly postpartum and not in the mood/ baby in the boob 24/7. Now If he asks and the baby is napping I will 100% of time give head lol. With that said, it depends on how your partnership and intimacy are going. If there are some issues… the masturbation is an issue too. Hiding it seems weird.
@Melanie same
He’s a guy. It’s normal. Anyone who thinks their husband doesn’t do it.. yeah chances are slim. And we have a very good sex life.. but I think it’s normal
It would bother me if he lied. But if he is open and honest if I ask then I’m less bothered.
Surely he can do what he wants, don’t you ever wank? You don’t own his penis. I’d tell him you know he does it though and tell him he doesn’t have to hide it. Unless the reason he hides it is coz you have reacted badly. If however he is refusing to have sex with you but wanking and watching porn then there is another issue
If it was instead of sex then yes that would not be good, but if your not in the mood and he is 🙌🏻 crack on 😉
masturbating by itself is whatever but the lying and trying to hide it would piss me off. like why not just be upfront or wait until you can do something together
If he was using porn I’d be annoyed. Idk if he watches but I wanna watch together or just tell me. As far as him jerking off, idc that much cause he’ll last longer in bed lmao
Agree. I don’t mind porn or masterbating any other time but if he’s doing it in secret and trying to hide it when I could literally be doing it or contributing I’d be annoyed. He’s probably embarrassed saying it’s something else but you’re right to be annoyed and upset
I would be annoyed by the porn.
My fiance masturbates when am lying next to him when I am sleeping but I wake up with the moving of it as it’s wakes me up 🥺 so annoys me but he laughs about it he won’t have sex with me all the time 🤔 either when I want to but when we first got together he would get me in the moody now he doesn’t do anything anymore I want him to like fuck my brains out but he won’t everytime he’s gets close to making me cum it goes cause he’s not going fast enough when I tell him then he stops cause he’s came 🤦🏼♀️
@Gemma Mc that is just obnoxious
Rather they were doing this than cheating. Can’t see the harm here. It’s natural
Wouldnt bother me by him masterbating. What would bother me is him hiding it. Id prefer him to come to me and say hes horny ect x
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I’d be annoyed if he tried to conceal it but then again I don’t make my hubby feel like he has to hide anything. And vice versa. If your husband is hiding it from you it’s because he knows you don’t like it…& I’m only speculating here. Unless you both have a mutual understanding and agreement not to do this is your home, it seems unfair and controlling. Maybe you need to have that conversation and come to an agreement or compromise.
The hiding is an issue, if you're going to toss your sausage tell me....I might want to watch🤣🤣🤣🤣
If I was recovering from childbirth or any operation or have been unable or unwilling to satisfy his needs for a while, I wouldn't mind as we all have needs and he may just be embarrassed he's been caught.. embarrassing situation to be caught in after all and i would just speak about it afterwards saying that I don't mind and that he doesn't have to hide it from me, I'd just rather he be truthful and that would be the end of it. Where as if he's sneaking off to do it and as a couple we had no sex life because he wasn't putting in the effort with me or accepting my advances then that would be a problem for me and tbh the health of a relationship, so it depends on the situation I guess x
If you have a good sex life and you're both content with how often you have sex then fair enough. If his drive is higher than yours then I wouldn't have a problem with him masturbating. If he was pushing back to sex and then wanking that would be an issue
I’m not okay with this, everyone’s boundaries are different. I would leave as I think it is disgusting and sexually objectifying women, as well as very disrespectful to your partner. Wank to our videos and my pictures by all means but not to another woman! And hiding it makes it even weirder. X
No issue with masturbation but hiding it/watching porn when you’re home (and not including you) - I wouldn’t be ok with personally.
It would annoy me if I'm literally in the house, wouldn't bother me any other time