✨Gender Grief✨

Honestly this is all I wanted with this pregnancy when I found out it was a boy i was gutted I was convinced my heart set and everything I just want another little girl with having my 3rd boy

This is a very common issue to be sad and in a way grief for the life you idealized about having. There were probably a lot of imagined moments and things that pop up as you watched your first son grow thinking it’ll be so awesome when he has a sister and he’ll be a great big brother. Just hold on to the fact that one day they find themselves a wonderful girl to match your wonderful boys and you’ll have the daughters you always wanted or grandkids.

I’ve always wanted a girl for as long as I can remember, I just thought I was a girl mum. When I found out my son was a boy I was gutted, I soon got over it and soon as I met him all that disappointment went away! I would love to have a girl one day, when I eventually have a second child I know I’ll be disappointed if it’s a boy as if love two children and know if I get another boy ill probably want to try again but same as you would be worried it’d be a boy. I love my boy more than anything but I’d love one of each x

I have always wanted 2 boys and a girl. I was convinced my son was a girl when I got pregnant with my first, he's a boy. Now I'm pregnant with twins, I thought for sure one would be a girl, they're both boys. I'm lucky to even have three kids because my husband only wanted two, so I will never have a girl. I just found out 4 weeks ago, so I'm still getting over it.

The relationship you envisaged with a daughter may not have materialised anyway.. they may have been into 'boyish' things and hated spa days and coffee dates and all those stereotypical scenarios in your mind. The relationship with your boys may be better than you ever imagined, chances are at least one of them will be a 'mummy's boy' and completely dote on you for the rest of your days.💙💙 This is an amazing opportunity to raise the next generation of young men, to teach them to be respectful, kind and sensitive.. and if/when they meet their partners as adults, you can be the BEST MIL going. I've had these thoughts and feelings too, and am starting to feel at peace with where we are. Watching my two boys together, seeing their bond and imagine it strengthening, becoming the best of friends well into adulthood... What a gift you have given them both. 🥰

I know how you feel. I only have one baby and he is a boy. I was really hoping for a *healthy baby* before anything else but deep down I wanted a girl. My pregnancy was hard on me, I got preeclampsia and almost died at the end. Now Im having heart problems that no one knows what is wrong with me. I most likely won’t have any more babies. I love my son with all my heart, I truly do. With getting on this app, I see so many mamas with their cute daughters and I start daydreaming about having a baby girl. Your feelings are valid

I appreciate all your comments and I fully agree with them. It’s just hard but I guess that’s just life, I could have it a lot worse as some people long for a healthy baby nevermind the gender. I just need to decide whether to have a last baby or work on being at peace with my boys! My second boy has just turned 1 and is well and truly a mummy’s boy💙 I can’t wait for the possible daughter in laws and granddaughters💗 I can imagine it’s the same for girl mums, however my horrible mind tells me I’ve got it worse because even though they’ve got two of the same gender. it’s two girls and most women love the thought of that mum and daughter relationship. I saw a comment the other day saying. “I have one of each but you’ve got to have a daughter, it’s the best”. Maybe that’s what has triggered me🤍 I feel guilty but I am no way whatsoever implying that I’d change my boys or I regret having boys, I do genuinely love being a boy mum. I’d just love a little girl to add to the gang✨

Sorry but you should be happy that you have 2 healthy children not crying because they aren’t the gender you wanted 😒

@Shannon you’re entitled to that opinion but mine and clearly a lot of others feelings are valid. I clearly state that I want to add a girl not change the children I’ve got.

Yeah and that’s really sad. Be happy you have healthy boys.

@Shannon This is so unkind and unhelpful, and an opinion that would be best kept to yourself. This should be a platform where we feel comfortable sharing, unjudged. She has the right to feel this way, and so many others feel the same.

@Briana why should I keep it to myself when everyone is entitled to an opinion?

@Shannon you’re basically telling us that what we feel is stupid, invalid and that we shouldn’t feel this way. You’re entitled to an opinion yes, but I personally would keep it to myself if I knew it wasn’t supportive in any way whatsoever😊

Yeah basically. It’s wrong, and nobody asked lol, freedom of speech whether people like it or not.

@Shannon aren’t you a friendly girl🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I understand how you feel, I had gender disappointment with my son and as my husband and I have a blended family we aren't having anymore kids so I will never get a baby girl, if you have the option to have more n try for a girl that's awesome but even if we were to have more kids I'd be scared it would be another boy, risk seems to high

Yeah, hence why I’ve got some good friends around me, thanks hun ❤️

I've birthed 2 girls and 1 boy, but I now have 2 boys and 1 girl. Just because they're born a certain gender doesn't mean they'll stay that way lol. I love boys tbh, and a part of me wanted my 3rd to be a boy (fiance wanted a girl) and we had a girl who is now 9.5 months old. We had a scare though, so tbh we were just relieved that she was OK

@Rebecca thank you for your comment. I totally agree and I’m so thankful to have two healthy babies. I absolutely love my wild boys, they’re so so loving and they definitely keep me on my toes🤣 I would just selfishly love to have the chance to experience both if I could, but obviously we can’t pick and choose🤍 so glad your little girl is here, happy and healthy✨

I have a boy, I always pictured myself as a boy mum and was over the moon when we found out we were having a boy. Then my sister had a girl and I see just how amazing it is to have a girl. I'm pregnant again now, and although I tell people I don't mind about the gender, I think I would prefer a girl. I just have this feeling that this one is another boy though. And I'll love it just the same as I would if it was a girl. But I'll forever think about the could have been if it was a girl. I don't want anymore kids after this one. I've only ever wanted 2 kids, same with my husband. But it would just be so nice to have one of each 🤷🏼‍♀️. Spose I'll find out in a few weeks

I sympathise with you. I’ve honestly never felt that way so I don’t know what it’s like. I’ve got 2 boys and I’m absolutely done.