OB

Are you asking lots of questions? My ob is really great but appointments are usually the same if I have no questions, you definitely should advocate for yourself and tell them if they can’t answer then you would like a list of outside resources. A lot of OBs don’t always wanna talk cuz a lot of mommas do their own research

@Natalia I always ask questions and she’s like well talk about that at a later appointment or she just gives vague answers and also tell me she doesn’t know how to help me. And I’m like those are words I don’t ever want to hear from my OB

Mmm yeah have you looked into any doulas services through your insurance? I feel they can be a lot more informative

@Natalia I’ve thought about it. I’m just frustrated with seeing my OB every two weeks for a few minutes and she tells me nothing about what to expect at the next appt or coming weeks. I’d rather do video call appts with her at this point 🙄. I just needed to vent lol

That would bother me. My OB always talks about anything I should know about and answers my questions. Some appointments we don’t have much to talk about and that’s fine. If he just never talked to me about anything though, I’d switch.

Same reason I switched to a different OB. My first ob was in and out of the room so fast. Literally would ask how I was and check baby’s hr. Never addressed anything I brought up. The nurse spent more time with me getting my vitals than the amount of time my ob was present. I will say ever since switching I’ve never been happier. My new ob is SOOOOO thorough. Asks me lots of questions about me and baby, discusses birthing plans with me, addresses my concerns as I bring them up, etc. I will say if you’re not happy don’t hesitate to switch. You’re paying for this and if your current ob isn’t meeting your needs there’s PLENTY of other Obs who would be happy to have you as patient.

I’m going to a nurse midwife at a birthing center. They spend about an hour with me at all my appointments and do a ton of education.

Is it possible to switch to a midwife?

@Valerie tbh I have no idea how midwives work and if my insurance covers them. I have tricare prime. I’ve always just gone to an OB and that’s it.

@Lisa it might be possible to look into UCSD, they have a group of midwives there that work in the hospital and take insurance. They might take your insurance. I think there’s a hillcrest location and La Jolla location.

@Alexis @Gennifer I just feel so awkward to even ask questions now because she doesn’t answer them or give details about things. I’m always clueless leaving my appts. I learn more from groups like this about what to expect and what to look out for. I’m 28 weeks and other moms have been told to do kick counts and my OB literally said nothing at all about anything. So I’m like okay I’ll just not do anything.

@Valerie I’ve heard about UCSD but all of my doctors and even my PCM are affiliated with Sharp hospitals so I’m not sure if they’d even let me get a referral out. It’s frustrating. I complain to my husband about tricare all the time and the doctors they gave me and wish I just stayed with my job’s insurance 😭

@Lisa I will say my ob said to start kick counts at 32 weeks just because right now it’s a little unpredictable when they’ll be active or not. Not saying the other ob are wrong though, there’s probably like a range for when you can start. But if you’re not happy with your provider I would just switch. Patient and provider relationship and trust is so important, it’s one of the biggest things stressed at my school. I saw you mention your insurance not having the best coverage, but I’m sure the facility you go to has more than 1 ob. They may even have a midwife/doula team if you’d prefer that. If not, could you try staying within the same health care system but just a different location?

@Alexis I go to two locations with that team. My doctor will either be at one location or the other and doesn’t really prefer having me seen by another ob unless her schedule is booked up

@Lisa that’s not up to your doctor though. Sure they may not prefer for you to go see someone else but if you’re not happy then I’d say switch. You are literally paying to be seen and have your questions answered. You should be walking out of there satisfied and not scared to talk to your dr. As someone who works in healthcare one of the biggest things is the providers relationship with their provider. You should be able to trust that your provider is taking care of you without having to worry or question them and know that they have the knowledge to pass any information you seek to you. If you can’t then you need to move on to someone you can establish a better relationship with.

I feel you! I feel the same about my OB. I tried to transfer somewhere else but they told me they don’t accept transfers after 28wks. So, transfer prior to if you can. As a first timer, I wish they would give tips and heads up on what to expect. But they really just check & make sure your health is on track for a healthy delivery. Wish I would have started with a Midwife from the start!

@Liz I’m already 28 weeks so I feel like they might not transfer me either. The last time I was pregnant was 8 years ago and it all feels new to me again lol. There’s more info now and more things to learn about. My first pregnancy I was never told anything about my baby’s growth and I stopped working because of morning sickness being really bad so now I’m just having to experience it all again and working full time. Tbh I feel lost throughout this pregnancy with my current ob 😅 but I can try to make it work for now

@Lisa You could at least call some others, explain your situation, and see if they’ll take you. Or if there’s multiple OBs in the practice, then tell them you’re not happy with this one and you’d like to switch to one who will meet your needs. I switched late in my pregnancy with my first, just within the same practice.

@Lisa my PCP gave me more advise on what to expect than my OB. My OB refused to give me FMLA for morning sickness. My PCP gave me FMLA. If it wasn’t for my PCP, I would be SUFFERING right now.

@Lisa I asked my OB for a document to take to the DMV for the temp handicap label.. he almost refused and said he can’t say pregnancy is a disability, bc it’s not. I told him, the DMV just wants to verify I’m in my third trimester so they can issue me the label. He then said, ok, I can only give you a pregnancy confirmation form. I was like, GAHHHH why do you have to be so difficult!! 😣

@Liz that’s crazy! Some doctors honestly seem like they either don’t care or don’t know what they’re doing.

@Liz I’ve thought about this! I have GD so I wanted to ask my MFM or OB if one of them could do this for me. I’d rather ask my MFM but I wonder if she can also sign my fmla papers or if it has to be OB only

@Lisa if they don’t.. I would try your PCP as well.

@Lisa I’m pretty sure in CA you don’t need a referral for maternity care. At least I didn’t, and I had a strict small HMO plan. You could call your insurance to see if they are in network. Even if they aren’t, tricare is typically seen as a great insurance by practitioners because they pay out well (at least in my experience so far - I’m in mental health care), so I’ve heard of tricare creating a single case agreement where the facility doesn’t agree to be in network as a whole, but they do agree to be in network just for you. Might be worth looking into if you are serious about switching and wanting a more client/patient-centered approach.